how to start a fight.....

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One year I bought my motherinlaw a cemetary plot for Christmas. THe next year I got her nothing. When she asked why the slight I said " You never used what I got you last year"...and that's how the fight started.
I took my wife to a restaurant and ordered a rare steak. The waiter asked if I was worried about the mad cow. I said: "Nah, she can order on her own....and that's how the fight started.
My wife and I were at her high school reunion. She was staring at a drunk guy, sitting alone and swigging drinks. She explained he was her old boyfriend and hasn't been sober since she broke up with him. I responded: " Wow, I never thought anyone could celebrate that long"...
and that's how the fight started.
My wife sat down next to me as I was channel flipping. She asked what was on the TV. I said:
"Dust"...and that's how the fight started.

Posted on Tue Dec 07 04:30:22 PST 2010

continued.....

My wife was hinting for a birthday present by saying she wanted something that went from 0 to 160 in 3 seconds. I bought her a new bathroom scale.....and that's how the fight started.
My wife was examining her body in a full length mirror. She said she looked horribly fat, old and ugly. She said she needed a compliment from me. I said her eyesight was damn near perfect....and that's how the fight started.

Posted on Tue Dec 07 04:33:15 PST 2010

Poppa do you even have a place to live now. OMG those jokes are incredible I'm laughing so hard I can barely put this response in and I have tears rolling out of my eyes. If I were you I wouldn't eat anything that your wife cooks for a while just in case You crack me up these are way too funny I love these Poppa pull some more out of your hat.

Posted on Tue Dec 07 11:21:29 PST 2010

Too funny, Poppa. ROTFLMAO.

Posted on Tue Dec 07 15:01:40 PST 2010

OMG! This is hilarious! Thanks for sharing Poppa and keep it rolling but I must say, do we need to start taking up a collection for you to find a new place to live as I agree better watch your food.

Posted on Tue Dec 07 22:02:51 PST 2010

Now I have to be honest here about what I did. I thought these were so great that I reposted them at another non-game forum I belong to. I hope I didn't break a forum or Gamehouse law by snitching the great fight starters.

Posted on Wed Dec 08 19:55:37 PST 2010

Thanks for the laughs, Poppa!

Posted on Thu Dec 09 04:43:28 PST 2010

Mr. P, you did it now...you know laughter is the best medicine for what ale's ya, right. I'm feeling so much better already, except for the stitch in my side. LOL. Thanks.

Posted on Wed Dec 15 19:42:21 PST 2010